


miraculous

by skuls



Series: Half-Light Universe [2]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: F/M, half-light au, this wasn;t supposed to happen, whoops, yes im back
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-19
Updated: 2017-10-19
Packaged: 2019-01-19 10:19:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12408525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skuls/pseuds/skuls
Summary: It feels too familiar.(Meeting William for the first time. Again.)





	miraculous

**Author's Note:**

> this is set mid-chapter 15 of half-light technically? post-canon/mid-canon. idk. 
> 
> i know i said i’d never write any more in this universe once upon a time. i lied. this is an experimental thing from a document of snippets i’ve been writing in this universe. i may never fully leave it lol.
> 
> (to clarify, this is set in the universe of the half-light rewrite. everything after this story has nothing to do with this universe in particular.)
> 
> (maybe i should make these into separate serieses to make things easier? idk.)

It feels too familiar.

The hospital is better than the ramshackle room in Georgia, more comfortable, but she keeps forgetting. The faces of the doctor, the nurse keep blurring into the faces of strangers, come for her baby. Monica Reyes’s voice blends with the doctor as she is encouraged to push. Mulder is there, which is different, and that is probably the only comfort in the moment. He holds her hand, whispers softly to her and brushes damp hair off of her forehead, and keeps her grounded to earth. To reality. “It's okay, Scully,” he's saying over and over again. “It's okay, I promise, we're going to be parents. You can do this.” She cries out with another contraction, crushing Mulder's hand, and he presses a kiss to the top of her head.

When it's over, she _knows_. More sure than she was before. She hears the earsplitting cry, and she just knows. The doctor holds him up and it's _him._ Her son.

“William,” she whispers, and she's reaching for him unconsciously. The doctor hands him to her and she's overwhelmed, she's shaking. She's crying and tucking the blankets tighter around his tiny body. “Oh, baby,” she whispers. “It's okay. I'm here. I'm not letting go.”

Mulder's crying, too. He keeps one arm wrapped around Scully and reaches down to cup William's head in his hand. William is crying, arms waving, and he looks exactly the same, eyes wide and blue. Scully sniffles, stroking his forehead, running a finger down the bridge of his nose. “I missed you,” she whispers, voice breaking.

If the nurse thinks this is a strange thing for a mother to say to her newborn, she doesn't comment. She shows Mulder how to cut the umbilical cord before scooping William up to clean him up. Scully immediately misses his presence. She turns towards Mulder, pressing her forehead into his upper arm, and whispers, “It's William, it's really William. We were right.” She feels rather than sees Mulder nodding, his hand stroking her hair gently. She wipes tears from her face and laughs a little. Mulder loops an arm around her shoulders and she presses her face into his side. This world is full of second chances, and this is the ultimate one. They cannot fail their son again. “We can't let him go,” she says into the scrubs they made Mulder wear over his clothes. “Mulder, we can't… we have to protect him…”

“Of course,” he whispers, his voice shaking. “I'm not leaving you guys this time. We're going to be a family, Scully, I swear.”

_A family_ , she thinks, balling a hand in the gauzy blue material. _Good._

It feels like an eternity before they bring William back, but it's a relief when they do. It washes over her all at once when they place him in her arms, pulls her out like the tide. Mulder's outside making phone calls; in the moment, it's just the two of them. She doesn't think about the last time she saw him: the way his face had screwed up when she handed him over to the social worker, his arms still reaching for her because he hated strangers, the way she'd almost followed them but stopped herself, collapsing against the door with sobs racking her body. She doesn't think about that. She holds her son close, watches him teeter on the edge of sleep, wrapped in a blue blanket. His hands get tangled in her hair where it's unraveled from its braid. She smiles down at him, a tear dripping off the edge of her nose. He's not a miracle here, but to her, he'll always be one.

“I still think he looks like Skinner,” Mulder says from beside her, brushing a hand over her shoulder as he sits beside her on the bed.

She sniffles, looking up at him with a look that’s probably horribly sappy and she doesn’t care at all, not one bit. “And I still think you're full of shit,” she says affectionately, scooting over so he can sit beside her.

“Scully!” He looks horrified. “Not in front of the baby!”

She rolls her eyes, but he's grinning at her so she grins back. She transfers William carefully to his waiting arms. Mulder cradles him gently, eyes full of deep wonder and love. The baby starts to fuss, arms waving desperately. “Hey now,” Mulder soothes, “none of that.” Scully hides her smile against his shoulder.

William fusses for a few minutes more before quieting down. Scully rests her chin on Mulder's shoulder so they can both watch him sleep. “You must be exhausted,” says Mulder softly.

“I am,” Scully murmurs. “But I'm so happy. I can't believe this, Mulder.”

“Me, either,” he whispers. “I can't believe he's here. I didn't… I didn't think it was possible.”

“Don't give up on a miracle. Remember?” She kisses her cheek and strokes William's forehead before leaning back into the pillows. God, she can't wait to go home. _Their_ apartment, one they picked out on their own where they can raise their son and she won't have to see bloodstains on the walls or on the pillows.

“You must have an elephant’s memory, Scully. After 27 years, you remember all my best lines.” Mulder shifts to the chair next to the bed, eyes glued to the baby.

“Mmm. Just the sweet ones,” Scully mumbles, unraveling the remnants of her braid and curling into the bed, pulling the blankets around herself. She watches Mulder and William, her vision focusing in on them like a beacon. They are all she sees.

She doesn't remember falling asleep, but she wakes up sometime later with moonlight streaming into the room. William's asleep in a hospital bassinet next to the bed and Mulder's slumped in the hard chair on the other side. He looks like he's sleeping, too, but he raises his head when he hears her stirring and immediately smiles. “Hi.”

“Hi.” Scully shifts in bed, wincing at the pain that hasn't quite left yet. “How's he doing?”

“He's fine.” Mulder reaches over the space between the beds for her hand and she takes it. “I asked the nurses to leave him in here so we could keep an eye on him. He's been sleeping a lot.”

“Big day.” She stretches, craning her neck to get a good look at William.

Mulder squeezes her fingers. “The cavalry's coming in tomorrow morning,” he relays. “Or at least your side of the family; Mom mentioned flying down next week, after we're settled in.”

It's strange to think about all the family William had (they have) now, even after all these years. All the people he never would've gotten to meet who are here. In the other place, her mother was the only family to visit her in the hospital, Bill and Tara and Matthew flying up a few weeks later (after Mulder was already gone). Now there's a whole string of people who have survived, the family she'd lost. The family he'd lost. The family they got back. She's never been anything but grateful for that. “Sounds good,” she says.

She pulls at Mulder's hand until he's sitting on the bed beside her, his head on her shoulder. They watch William sleep.

\---

Samantha and Melissa show up first, carpooling for the simple reason that they are living together until Samantha gets a college degree or feels safe living on her own. (“Whichever comes first,” she'd said to Scully over tea a few months ago.) Their sisters seemed to form something of a bond on the crazed trip to save them earlier in the year, and it’s simultaneously the strangest and best thing Scully ever could’ve imagined.

"It's convenient," Melissa cracks when they arrive, leaning down to kiss Scully’s cheek. "We only have to make one trip to both meet our new nephew."

“Fox told us it was a boy last night,” Samantha adds from the door. “I just want to apologize in advance for how crazy the Mulder genes are going to make this kid, Scully.”

“Hey!” Mulder protests.

Scully laughs, even though she almost feels like crying. These aunts that William never would've met, and they're here now. It feels a little miraculous. Too many miracles to count, now. “I kind of expected that.”

Melissa comes to her sister's side, leaning over the baby. “What're you going to call him?”

“Here, you want to hold him?” Scully shifts the baby into Melissa’s arms.

“William,” Mulder supplies.

Melissa snorts. “Yeah, like there's not already fifty William Scullys,” she says teasingly, rocking William a little, winking at Scully to show she isn’t serious. “Or is it William Mulder? There's one of those too, isn't there?”

“Unfortunately,” Samantha says dryly. “Maybe this one will turn out better.”

“It's William Scully,” clarifies Mulder. “It felt right.”

“And we're not calling him any variations on Bill,” Scully adds, reassuringly.

“Dad’ll like it for sure, Dana, but Billy is gonna be furious,” Melissa says, letting William grasp her finger. “He wanted to name his first boy William Scully III.”

“Funny,” Scully says lightly. “Tara told me she liked the name Matthew.”

Samantha studies the baby with a furrowed brow. “I think he looks like you,” she says to Mulder. “In all those old pictures Mom loves dragging out… she's going to be over the moon, you know.”

“Here, you want a turn?” Melissa passes William to Samantha. Samantha looks slightly terrified, but takes the baby carefully, like he might break. Melissa is staring at William's face with great concentration before announcing, “He definitely has your eyes, though, Day.”

“That's what I said,” Mulder agrees. “Her coloring, too.”

Samantha chews on her lower lip as she looks down at the baby. “He's adorable,” she says finally.

Scully laughs. “He is.”

She pets William's downy head for a moment before passing him back to Mulder. His tiny fingers curl and uncurl in the air as he whimpers; Mulder shushes him softly, rocking him back and forth. Samantha smiles a little, goes to tickle the bottom of the baby's feet.

Melissa comes over to sit by the bed. “Mom's elated, you know,” she says. “She's still so sad she missed out seeing Charlie’s son born; she's delighted to have two new grandkids in one year.”

Scully smiles waterily. She pushes back memories of her mother's face when she found out that William was gone, in the other place. Reminds herself that it isn't going to happen here. She can see Samantha tickling the baby, Mulder laughing. Melissa sitting beside her. The aunts William never would've known. She sniffles, wiping her eyes.

“Oh, Dana, what's wrong?” Melissa wraps an arm around her.

Scully shakes her head ruefully. “Hormones,” she sniffles into Melissa’s shoulder.

Melissa ruffles her hair playfully. “Crybaby.”

“Shut up,” Scully says, half laughing, slugging her shoulder in the shoulder. She can't remember the last time she was this happy.

\---

They're allowed to go home the next day. Scully immediately retreats to the bedroom, mumbling something about hospital mattresses being hell and sleeping for ten years after she kisses William on the forehead. Mulder paces the apartment with the baby, holding him up to the windows and showing him the rooms. William blinks at the fish tank, waving his hands at the burbling water. “That one's a molly,” Mulder says, bouncing him a little. “And that's a goldfish, Will, look.” William stuffs his fist in his mouth, uninterested. Mulder’s amused at this. “Well, you'll have to listen to me someday, kid,” he tells the baby seriously. William gnaws on his fist, looking Mulder right in the face, a look of almost equal seriousness (well, in newborn standards) on his face. Mulder laughs and kisses the tip of his son’s nose.

William seems to be growing tired after a while, eyelids drooping and tiny yawns. Mulder goes into the bedroom, intending to put him in his crib, but between the sight of Scully curled on the bed, hair hanging in her face, and William's fist curled into his shirt, he finds himself unable to. He crawls onto the bed beside Scully, pillowing William on his chest.

As soon as the mattress dips under his weight, Scully rolls towards him, resting her head on his shoulder. “Are you sleeping?” Mulder whispers, adjusting William in place. He snuffles quietly but doesn't cry.

“Yes,” she mumbles, and he smirks. She presses her nose into his collarbone. “Missed you guys, though.”

“Mmm.” He kisses her temple. She keeps her eyes closed, forehead pressing into the side of his neck. He watches William slowly drift off to sleep, can feel his son's breaths against his chest, and he's overwhelmed with love. He's always regretted how little he got to be a father in the other place--how he was barely around for Scully's pregnancy, even after he was returned, how he missed the birth, how he left after only three days, _three goddamn days,_ and William was gone when he got back. But he's here now, he's here, and he is never letting go. He loves this feeling too much to ever let go. He wants to live in this moment forever, wants to do this again. Wants to give William a little sibling someday, someone for him to grow up with. He strokes his son's downy hair with one hand, mumbles, “Let's have another,” against Scully's head.

She slugs him in the shoulder, muttering furiously, "You're hilarious. Talk to me in four years or so."

One corner of his mouth tugs up, and he leans down to kiss the top of Scully's head softly. "He's so perfect," he says. "We made this, Scully."

Scully opens her eyes, scoots a little closer to William and runs her fingers over his arm, whispering, “Hi.” William makes soft sounds that makes Mulder's heart swell; he turns to smile at Scully and she smiles back, a full-blown Scully grin that feels like looking straight into the sun. He leans forward and kisses her softly, their noses bumping together.

Scully smiles again, brushing hair off his face, before scooping William up and cradling him to her chest. “I'm going to put him down,” she says. “And then I'm going to go eat that casserole Mom said she stuck in the oven because I'm _starving_.”

Mulder laughs and kisses her again. “I'll go heat it up, okay?”

“Thank you.” Scully climbs off of the bed, crossing to the crib, and Mulder heads out into the kitchen. He's halfway convinced Maggie is a saint at this point, and her casserole feels like a confirmation. Just the sight of it makes his stomach growl like an angry werewolf. He sticks the tray in the oven and fixes Scully some tea. She pads out of the bedroom a few minutes later, hair wild around her shoulders and eyes sleepy, but they light up at the sight of the tea kettle. “I love you,” she says happily.

“William will be so relieved,” he teases and she rolls her eyes, still smiling.

They end up at the kitchen table, eating quietly. Mulder's already finished with his first piece and going for his second when he feels Scully's hand cover his. “Do you really want more kids?” she asks quietly. When he looks back at her, her face is largely neutral. She's waiting to see what he says.

“Yes,” he says. “I mean, someday, when Will's a little older… but I think it'll be good for him.” He swallows. “Being an only child isn't fun… no one to play with.” She smiles a little at that. He turns his hand up underneath hers. “What do you think?” he asks gently.

She's still smiling, just a little bit. She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, contemplating. “I like the idea,” she says. “I mean, I might not be enthusiastic about doing this all over again right this moment… but yes. I do like the idea. But, Mulder… we don't have to plan this all out right now. It… it would be crazy to plan all this out right now.”

“I know,” he says quickly, brushing his fingers over her palm. “It's just… nice to think about. You know?”

She smiles wider, rubbing his hand with her thumb. “I do.”

They sit in silence for a moment, hands clasped across the table, until a piercing cry comes from the bedroom. Scully shakes her head ruefully. “And here comes the process to changing your mind, right?” she teases.

Mulder makes a face at her. “I got him, Scully,” he says, getting up from the table. “You stay here and eat. I'll bring him out if he's hungry.”

“Mmm, thanks.” She brushes a hand against his hip as he passes. “I'm so glad you're here,” she whispers, so low he almost misses it.

_Don't worry, Scully,_ he thinks, entering the bedroom. _I'm not going anywhere._

\---

Three days later, Scully wakes up in the middle of the night to find Mulder's side of the bed empty. _He wouldn’t leave,_ she reminds herself, propping up on one elbow. _He probably just got up to use the bathroom or something._ But that doesn’t soothe the tight knot in her stomach as she pictures Mulder walking away, white-knuckling a suitcase with tears on his cheeks and the taste of him still in her mouth, William wailing in the background. She swallows. She crawls across the bed a little further, and finds the crib empty, too, the blanket flat on the mattress. Panic seizes in her throat, and she tries not to scream. _No,_ she thinks, the words building up in her throat and threatening to explode from her lips. _No, no, no, no, no._ She darts down the hall, on the verge of screaming their names, only to stop abruptly when she sees Mulder on the couch with William asleep on his chest. She stumbles, freezing in place, heart pounding so hard that she thinks Mulder must be able to hear it.

“Scully?” He sees her, eyes widening questioningly. “He was getting fussy and you haven't had a full night's sleep in days… I knew you had some milk pumped in the fridge… I fed him and he fell asleep, and…”

Scully takes a shaky breath, trembling in place, and waits for him to figure it out.

He seems to realize what she thought all at once. Three days. “I'm sorry,” he says quickly. “I’m so sorry, Scully, I thought…”

Scully blinks back tears, and she goes to sit on the couch, wrapping her arms tightly around them. It had always seemed like she'd had to trade Mulder for William and vice versa, even before someone tried to force her to make that choice. After Mulder was taken, she'd found out about William, and after he was born, Mulder had left. When she'd given William up, Mulder had returned shortly after. It had always seemed impossible, the idea that she could have them both at once. She'd felt like she'd have to choose sooner or later. She’d felt like one of them was going to have to leave.

Scully kisses her son's forehead, and turns her face against Mulder's shoulder. Her fingers curl into his shirt--because even though she knows he won’t leave, she feels as if she has to hold him here, just in case. “Don't do that again,” she whispers. “I thought… I just… don't do that again. Please. I thought you were gone. I thought I'd lost you both.”

“I'm not going anywhere,” he promises them both. He kisses the top of her head, scoots backwards so he's mostly lying down. William stays asleep, snuffles a little and curls tiny fingers around the collar of Mulder's t-shirt. Scully leans into his side, bringing her hand up to rest on William's back. Mulder pulls her closer, holding both of them at once. “I'm not going anywhere,” he repeats in a whisper.

\---

It gets easier over time.

The nightmares stop. Scully is able to move William's crib out of their room and into his own room down the hall. She stops hovering over him constantly, is able to leave him with her parents or Melissa and Samantha for an evening. When he has his first birthday, she feels like she can breathe easily now, like the deadline is up. It's ridiculous to think that she'd lose him (give him up) at the same time she did in the other place, but she couldn't shake the feeling, no matter how many times she told herself she wouldn't, no matter what, never again. But it feels like letting out a held breath when William's birthday passes and he is still here and Mulder is still here. She feels like she can breathe again, can stop worrying.

Scully decides to keep the teaching position at Quantico she took on during the end of her pregnancy, at least on a part-time basis. Skinner arranges it so she can work with Monica and Mulder on the X-Files, at least part time. (Monica Reyes was reassigned to the X-Files after everything that happened in Oregon, and Mulder seemed to agree with the decision, suggesting that Scully use this as an excuse to take a step back for her and the baby. It’s worked pretty well so far: Monica’s enough of a believer to keep Mulder happy, sensible enough to keep them out of trouble most of the time, and Scully’s there to provide the skeptical voice of reason--her words--most of the time. Occasionally, Monica calls John Doggett for input. It works well, especially considering Monica’s budding relationship with Melissa.) Mulder and Scully have something of an agreement that she'll focus on work in the morgue and he'll keep from taking crazy risks in the field or running off by himself. They are both tired--not tired enough to stop, maybe, but tired enough to take a step back. Their son looms heavy in both their minds. “Whatever happens, I want us to get home to him,” Mulder says one night at the kitchen table, reaching across the table for her hand. “Both of us.” She squeezes it hard, nodding, tears burning at the back of her eyes.

It's not as hard as she expected, being parents and staying at the FBI. (Definitely easier than single motherhood, autopsies and muddled X-Files and the constant worry about her family.) She only teaches a couple of classes a week when he's still little, after her maternity leave ends, so she can take care of him for most of the day. They usually take him into Baltimore, to Melissa’s or her parents, when she has to teach, but sometimes Mulder will just take Will to the office with him when he's not on a case and can keep an eye on him. At one point, Scully comes down to the office to pick William up and finds Mulder pacing around the office taking on the phone about vampires, William in a sling on his chest. William is sucking on a pacifier contentedly, legs swinging in the air. “No, it should be _two_ puncture wounds on the neck,” Mulder says impatiently, taking another lap around the desk. “Two. Did Agent Reyes not brief you?” He passes Scully and picks up William's little hand, waving it at her as he goes. She hides a smile behind her hand.

They've never actually gotten to be parents together, and it turns out that they are good at it. A little eccentric (Melissa’s words), maybe, but good. It's a little bit of a learning curve on Mulder's part, but that's to be expected. Scully's grateful for her previous experience as much as she is grateful that the threat of danger is gone. (Which isn't to say she doesn't tense, every now and then, when lights stream through the window. That she doesn't tighten her hold on William, or step a little closer to the crib. But it's like Mulder had told her again and again during her pregnancy: the aliens aren't coming back. It's over. She's prepared for the possibility that it's not, but in the moment, she allows herself to think that it is. That they're safe.) They're a team in raising their son as much as they are in the FBI, and it works beautifully. They are happy. This new life, being parents, feels like peace. It feels like home.

 


End file.
